Refreshed.
Today, I was reminded again of the BEAUTY of the gospel. A Hatian man named Yvfdo visited my French class, and eagerly shared his story. He called his entire life a testimony, one that is full of the promise that Christ will never leave us or forsake us. He shared pieces of his heart that were only fashioned because of the Lord’s sovereign pull on his life. My heart was warmed anew to the gracious provision of the Lord.
I need, each moment of the day, to remind myself that my life is NOT mine own. I belong to a Father who is fully aware of the my most basic needs, and the small curvatures of my heart that even I myself am unaware. Yvfdo’s story reminded me of this truth so brilliantly.
I am continually in thought (and prayer, though not quite as disciplined in this arena) about the country and people of France. Yvfdo reminded us that a revolution is only manifest to begin with, in one single heart. It is only by the Lord’s grace that I have been exposed to disparity that is so deeply entrenched in the French spiritual landscape. I do not claim to be able to change a country, nor that I am being called to this. I do not perceive my cultural leanings and understandings to be far superior to those of possessed by French individuals. I do know, however, that the Lord has pulled my heart. He has given me such a love that at times I feel paralyzed. I don’t know quite what this means, but someday, I am sure I will understand…
le temps personnifiée
I can’t make you stop
I just want you to stop
Just
STOP.
I want you to crouch down in the trenches of my memories
…and linger there
Until I am softly rendered anew with the ebbing dawn
But I can’t
Because you won’t stop
And there is nothing I can do
And this is just the point.
DAY 2.
Fun little snippets from nyc-life today:
–1.75 hour facial=$27 (a bargain like you wouldn’t believe)
–antique shopping with an antique-savvy friend (almost located a dinner ring, Lindsey Williamson)
–Steps on Broadway, street jazz class (hmm… ballet teachers vs. street teachers, very very different- our teacher called us “biotches” to motivate us to act sassy with his choreography..)
–Upper East Side apartment visit (renewed inspiration to find my own)
–Discovery of Neuhaus Belgian chocolate (every girl’s fix at only $9/5 truffles!)
–Depressing browse though Barney’s New York (probably not the best idea, note to self: new Marc Jacobs bags are fabulous)
–Mercury Lounge, SoHo, for The Kin (one of the most riveting concerts EVER)
–Prancing on the roof of the Vogue (we made it before the ESB turned off at midnight)
NIGHT MOON.
The Home I once Knew
Well, I arrived in NYC safe and sound yesterday around 1PM, noon our time. Unfortunately, coming from the arctic, I forgot about the change of rain here in January. I arrived to a tropical storm, dressed to visit the north pole– interesting combination.
It was really wonderful to be re-united with my freshman roommates and girls who live in the House of Clara Barton (Clara Barton, where is she, I don’t know, I don’t know). I feel so at home, and so loved. I was so pleasantly surprised to hear talk of The Reason for God, and that the girls call Redeemer their home church. It has been exciting having gospel conversation, and to see that these girls have simultaneously been experiencing so much growth.
…
I had gone to a French church once during my Freshman year, and didn’t understand a thing. Fortunately, I saved the bulletin, and found it a little while ago in a random pile of memorabilia. I glanced at the “events” in the small church, stemming from very old Huguenot roots, and discovered a Bible study on Wednesday nights. Long story short, I ended up in a tiny French Episcopal church with five congregation members and their British pastor on the Upper East Side. It was certainly the interesting experience, and my did their conversation get off track. Let’s just say, the time was wonderful for my French, not so good for my heart.
…
I am going to a dance class today, for the first time since my knee injury, and feel really relieved that I can finally DANCE, but also NERVOUS. Pray I will not return to Bethel on crutches.
…
Last thing, I was almost an extra on the show “Cupid” last night… real random.
Peace.
A Bookend…
I clearly was not the most successful blogger while I was in France, and I feel as if my adventures abroad are just sort of left unfinished, so I thought I would add some closing comments, and then dabble with the idea of blogging about my “everyday life,” only because my roomies are RELENTLESS. haha.
The last day of my Grenoble adventure (December 19th) I collected all my belongings, and miraculously all contents (including Christmas gifts) fit into two under-fifty pound bags. My host mom, drove me to a hotel which I would stay at in order not to miss the TGV train (a sort of high-speed train) at 4ish in the morning. The tragedy is that I didn’t even shed one tear…no, not one, after we parted. I think that I may have been completely emotionless, actually. After making some beautiful memories with another girl on the trip, named Sarah Oliver, I went to bed and had two luxurious hours of sleep… The next morning I took a train for 3 hours, hobbled my way through the airport, and accidently asked for a wheelchair at the KLM desk to help me with my knee, which ended up being a lifesaver! hahaha. I felt like an old woman. After journalling some of my last thoughts, and filling up the pages completely in a journal given to me by MJ and Chris, I drank my last cup of hot chocolate and pain de chocolat, and waited to board my horribly long flight for Detroit. On the plane, again, I was emotionless. Before, I would have pictured myself being “that girl” who couldn’t stop bawling on the plane, and is, quite frankly, super annoying.
Anyway, the point is, I think God did what he wanted when I was in France. I feel like he also prepared me well for the return. I am excited to see what he is going to do this semester and am quite happy that I am not “living in the past,” and always referring to “that one time in France.” I do, however, have a need to share things that are on my heart, and I am not sure what this looks like. I hope that my experiences in France can become like fine pieces of linen, woven into the person of Katie. I have developed a deep emotion for France and the French people. I am blessed that God revealed so many things to me about French culture and a deep need for a Jesus. I saw my need so much clearly for Jesus in a country where the only way hardened hearts will be softened is by a Christ who is Sovereign and calling a people for himself. I want to invest in such a ministry. We shall see where this leads me…
QUICK update:)
Hello, all
So, I am still thriving in this lovely country. And, am in the process to undergo a sort of French “make-over” only because the French have an incredible sense of style and beauty. And, partly in revenge towards the French who 2.5 seconds after they see me, automatically think that I am from Sweden. So, I went ahead and tried out RED lipstick, but, alas, am not sure I can pull it off. Thoughts? Hopefully there will be a chic haircut to come… but definitely don’t have money for clothes here:( bummer. Don’t worry, not planning on buying a BERET. I still can’t get over the thought that they are so cliché.
Otherwise… THANKSGIVING here was absolutely perfect. I ever got to inform the French a little bit about the story of Thanksgiving via a skit. hahaha- involving Squanto and William Bradford.
God is good. Please continue to be in prayer for my host family– my host brother is taking his driving test on Thursday, it’s kind of a big deal in France, and really hard to pass from what I have been told. I pray that their hearts would be softened to the love of Christ and the burdens that he can take.
I love you all. WOW. 16 days…
I have a million and one finals– just trying to remember, day-by-day.
Be blessed.
kb
Heaviness.
Today is November 18, 2008… one month and one day from now, I will return home to the United States. I am trying to make sense of what this means exactly. Lately I have been asking myself how I can optimize the rest of my time here, how I can somewhat <leave a legacy> in France, and how I can take what I have learned in France and apply it to my Minnesota world. The Lord has completely overwhelmed me with his graciousness this semester. I do not deserve to be in France, to have found an amazing community of believers, to live in a house where I can rise each morning to the Alpes, but yet the Lord has called me here.
I feel that in leaving France, I will in effect, be leaving a part of myself here, but I trust that the Lord is GOOD and if he wills for me to return, he will for me direct such a path.
Hello world!
Welcome to WordPress.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it and start blogging!
